


and there are love songs playing

by katotastic000



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: M/M, but he has a wife so oof, gay!ishimaru, i guess, ishimondo - Freeform, they're older
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-16
Updated: 2020-03-16
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:42:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,184
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23174869
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/katotastic000/pseuds/katotastic000
Summary: Nine years ago, Mondo confessed. They have not talked ever since; up until today.
Relationships: Ishimaru Kiyotaka/Oowada Mondo
Comments: 8
Kudos: 47





	and there are love songs playing

**Author's Note:**

> We're currently reading a short story in class and the story's vibe kinda inspired me even though the story almost has nothing to do with this fanfic.  
> Uhhhh, yeah, enjoy!

The car is dragging along its tires on the rough asphalt. The buildings' windows are empty. Lonely streetlights hide the darkness that surrounds them. This ride is taking forever.

Mondo shifts into a lower gear even though he has seen no other cars in what felt like thirty minutes. Just now was the fourth time he has considered just speeding to the train station. It takes a few drops for him to realize that it's raining. He groans for the effort of turning on the wipers and for the red light that stops him. The man in the passenger seat looks up, then turns back as he notices that Mondo has not even turned to him in the first place. The wipers are creaking on the windshield. He makes a mental note to buy new ones but he's pretty sure he'll forget anyway, so he doesn't even try. His plan to fill the silence works. It makes him more aware that they haven't talked at all on this drive. Or at their class reunion. Or in the last nine years.

Kiyotaka watches his movements in the reflection of the car window. He corrects his frown to a more neutral expression and readjusts his glasses although they have been sitting perfectly for three years. To his right, Mondo groans. He turns and sees him throwing the wiper lever into a setting and his hand back onto the gear shift. For a second, Ishimaru remembers a weight in his palm, warm and rough. He brushes his thumb over skin which he notices is his own. He relaxes his clenched fist and faces away. His expression has returned to a frown. He doesn't care to fix it.

The drive continues. Tires are scraping over asphalt, wipers over windshields and Kiyotaka scrapes his thumb nail over the other. That has left marks. The white stripes were the first thing that caught Mondo's eye as they shook hands when they saw each other again. They were watching their fingers, both clumsily clasping each other and trying to exchange confidence where they had none. Then he spotted the ring and let go. His hand fell to his side, dangling lifelessly. Mondo was close to saying, "Congrats on your marriage" but that would be more than they both can bear.

The last turn, left, comes into view. Tears form in Kiyotaka's eyes as he wonders if a day like this will repeat itself in his life. It won't, he knows. The guilt is too heavy for him to heave on his shoulders once again. He bites his tongue, presses it further down. He searches for words in the raindrops on the glass, in the wretched screeches of the windshield wipers, the dull clicking of the indicator, in the words Mondo buries as he opens his mouth and closes it just after. "Take me home," he says and begs that Mondo sees through the hollow words. He repeats, "Please take me home" and grabs onto Mondo's hand. Nine years, hasn't it? Kiyotaka hides the ring in his fist. Mondo pulls away. The clicking stops and resumes. They turn right.

"What the fuck is up with you, huh?" Mondo's voice is sharp enough to cut a blade. It drowns out the rain outside. They have stopped on the side of the road. Around them, the world seems empty. "Not talking to me in nine fucking years and now... _this_?" His loss for words make him huff and slam his fist against the steering wheel.

Kiyotaka does not wince. He stands tall and strong. His wet cheeks are the only marks that soil his appearance, his disguise. It crumbles under the man sitting before him, the first and only man he ever got to love. That was before the final decision. He chose what was never asked of him over himself: becoming the Prime Minister of Japan, clearing his family's name of all accusations and disgrace. Kiyotaka regrets. That he must realize it like this, hearing his soothing low voice shredded, seeing his strong stunning face disfigured, rips a sob out of his throat.

"God, yeah I know you were in a shitty situation," Mondo continues, he lowers his head but not his volume. "But just saying 'We can't' and then not talking to me in nine fucking years, not even trying to figure it out, I-" He sighs and it does little help. He rumbles as he turns to look Kiyotaka in the eyes without mercy, "Do you know what that's like?" Mondo pretends like he doesn't care that Ishimaru sobs and cries, just stares at him. "You know, I loved you because you faced all of your problems, you actually dealt with all of your shit, like I never could!" Mondo grits and bares his teeth, bites down on his lower jaw with force. His jaws are ripped apart by rage, "And you throw that _all_ away! As if you don't give a _shit_ about me or your life!"

"Don't make assumptions." Mondo's squinted eyes widen. Kiyotaka dabs away the wet streams on his cheeks with the sleeve of his shirt. He swallows. As he speaks, his voice flattens, "Yes, I have to admit that my reaction to your confession was wrong. Yes, what I just did was not very rational. But do you think it was possible for me to act upon my love for you while I was promised to the daughter of the only man who still had hope in my name since I was in university? Do you think I would be able to uphold a healthy and stable relationship with a man while presenting myself at my wife's side in public?"

Mondo breathes out and scrapes his canine on another tooth. "I know but," He looks at Ishimaru who sits before him like a statue. Mondo wonders if he is even breathing. "was there really no way that we-" His shoulders sink. "No, not when I never even texted you." He buries his face into his hands as his elbows are propped up on the steering wheel. "I knew that it's hard for you." He feels a hand on his shoulder. He reaches in the same direction and stops. "And I was so...yeah, I was dissapointed." He looks up and out of the windshield. The world is empty. "And frustrated. And then, I thought I shouldn't be making it worse with trying to get you back. And then, it's been suddenly years since then and I still couldn't really move on." "Does that mean you still love me?", Mondo hears from the side. He turns. Both of them are trying to smile and nobody succeeds. "I don't know." Kiyotaka nods. "Me neither."

They lean back into the car seats. Mondo turns on the radio - Ishimaru raises his head. His fingers that were fumbling with his ring just a second ago come to a halt. "What are you doing?", he asks. Mondo turns his head to look at him. Something appears in Kiyotaka's mind that reminds him of a memory. "Deciding to where I take you home."


End file.
